5 Crazy Sports Predictions For 2013

Some may consider these forecasts very logical while others won't know how to handle the absurdity.

Josh Helmuthby Josh Helmuth

Before reading on, just remember that 2012 brought us the sentencing of a maniacal psycho-path assistant coach from 'Happy Valley,' a skydiver jumping from outer space, seven MLB no-hitters, a bounty program led by an NFL franchise and Peyton Manning in a Bronco uniform.

And you thought 2012 was a ho-hum year in sports?

Here's a few things that could come into fruition in 2013.

The New Orleans Hornets become the New Orleans Mosquitoes.

Think that's funny? It's a real possibility. The owner wanted to change the name from the Hornets to something that fits; something more… Louisiana. Mosquitoes is one of the names the NBA approved for trademarking. Therefore, Mosquitoes it is!

Now I can't wait for the day my Chicago Bulls become the Chicago Dogs; because hot dogs have about as much to do with Chicago as Mosquitoes in New Orleans.

The world will finally understand how awful Tim Tebow is.

I'm sorry. I love Tim Tebow. He's a great guy. How can you dislike a man that gives free circumcisions to babies in Fiji (or somewhere like that). Unfortunately, he's probably better at delivering foreskin than pigskin.

Being one of the greatest motivators in sports can get you far, but with worst throwing mechanics the NFL has seen for a starting QB in light years, Tebow will be lucky to lead a dreadful Jaguars team to a .500 record in 2013. I'm rooting for Tim just like everyone else, but expect the circus to finally conclude — along with Tebow's quarterback career — in the upcoming year.

The Big East completely folds.

All of the Catholic schools have decided to exit the conference after watching nearly every competitive school leave with their football money. Boise State now claims they're staying in the Mountain West as well; that makes a grand total of 14 teams exiting in two years. Think a conference can survive when your best team is Temple?

The LA Clippers win the NBA title.

If you're a Laker fan you probably think this is a joke. You know what really is a joke? The Lakers 15-15 record with Dwight Howard and Kobe Bryant leading the way.

The Clippers are currently riding a 17-game winning streak. That's right; they've won 17 games. In a row. They're also 9-1 at home this year.

With Blake Griffin and Chris Paul heading the charge, the Clippers are the best ticket in LA right now; possibly all of basketball. Don't get me wrong, the Heat are still the favorites and should repeat. But if there is an injury to LeBron James or Dwyane Wade, the youthful Clipps could be raising their first banner in franchise history.

The New York Yankees finish dead last.

Have you seen what the AL East has done this off-season?

The Blue Jays have added Jose Reyes, R.A. Dickey, Josh Johnson, Melky Cabrera, Emilio Bonifacio and Mark Buehrle. Coming off a 93-win season, the young Orioles are only going to be better with age and a foundation surrounding Adam Jones. And the Rays won 90 games last year with a hurt Evan Longoria and return Cy Young winner David Price. Thus, leaving us with the Red Sox and Yankees.

Both teams are still reeling from over-spending on big names. But let's stick with the Yanks. Sure, that mega contract for Alex Rodriguez looked fantastic years ago. But now he's 37 years old and has yet another hip surgery scheduled for January. The man is literally falling apart. Also in line for their proverbial AARP cards are Kevin Youkilis and Derek Jeter; both nearing 40 (note, Youkilis will actually be 34, but his plagued injury history and recent play have us all believing that his birth certificiate actually reads 1949 instead of '79.)

I also don't have confidence in a team that starts Hiroki Kuroda and Andy Pettitte (also age 40) as their No. 2 and No. 3 starters in the rotation.

Listen, I'm not saying the Yankees will be awful, but this division is going to be absolutely insane; the toughest to win in decades. I wouldn't be shocked to see the Red Sox and the Yankees hovering around 82 wins; putting them at the bottom of the stack in an absurdly tough AL East.

How's that for crazy?
 

Josh Helmuth is the editor for CraveOnline Sports. You can follow him on Twitter @JHelmuth or subscribe at Facebook.com/CraveOnlineSports.

Photo Credit: Getty

By: Jonathan Daniel
Collection: Getty Images Sport