Evil Clown Will Stalk Your Child for a Fee

Give your child the gift of therapy.

max-millerby max-miller
Naturally, the best way to celebrate the birth of your children is by scaring the absolute crap out of them. And now, for a small fee, you can hire a terrifying clown to do that dirty work for you.

According to the U.K. newspaper Metro, Swiss actor Dominic Deville will dress up as a creepy clown and stalk your child for a week leading up to his or her birthday.

The entire stalking clown package consists of Deville sending scary texts, making prank phone calls, and leaving notes letting your child know that they are being watched and will eventually be attacked.

The “attack” is actually just a cake being smashed into your child’s face, so if your child doesn’t end up being scared, at least they will have a good amount of humiliation to look forward to. If the kid manages to dodge the cake smashing, they get to keep and eat the cake as a gift.

If at any point during the week a child appears to be truly scared, parents can call off the evil clown, but Deville claims that rarely happens since kids love being scared senseless.

Any money you don’t end up spending on this service can go towards the many, many years of therapy your child will need.

Also Read: See the worst parents in the world.