Not a Joke: Fred Durst To Star In “Douchebag” Sitcom

First one to complain leaves with a bloodstain.

Johnny Firecloudby Johnny Firecloud

I ignored this initially, assuming that the internet sensationalists had taken an abstract iota of fact and spun it into some warped delusion that nobody in their right mind would actually greenlight, let alone finance. But it's happening: Limp Bizkit frontman Fred Durst has signed on to star in a CBS sitcom that is being referred to as "Douchebag".

According to, the show will revolve around a rock star trying to balance his family life with his career commitments. And by "career commitments," we mean making music for hateful idiots, the puff-chested shit-talking self-aggrandizing nonsense that passes for the soundtrack to the lowest denominator of Middle America in this day & age. Durst has made a career of pandering on overdrive to the demented nonthinkers with turbulent pasts, displaced anger and intensely limited cerebral capacity – or just the people who idealize such types and celebrate purposeless ego-stroking conflict magnets that hook a vacuum hose to the soul of musical artistry and flip the switch with a sneer and a middle finger.

Oh look, Fred & the boys have already written the show's theme song:

The show will be written by Matthew Carlson, who worked on the pan-flash ABC sitcom "Mr. Sunshine." John Schneider, Durst's manager/producer and Rob Schneider's brother (how's that for sweet irony), will serve as a non-writing producer.

Durst has previously guest-starred on TV series like "House," and the singer even directed a pair of feature films – 2007's The Education of Charlie Banks and 2008's The Longshots.

Limp Bizkit has sold over 30 million albums. That's another way of saying that there is a section of society violently misogynous and thick-headed enough to follow the human caricature into the television realm. And while we wouldn't exactly put any bets on it making a splash in primetime, with the Kardashian whores running the televised universe these days, absolutely anything is possible.