Bruce Willis as G.I. Joe in ‘G.I. Joe: Retaliation?’

The whole "lifelike hair" thing might be a problem. Also, when did they rename G.I. Joe: Cobra Strikes?

William Bibbianiby William Bibbiani

Bruce Willis - GI Joe 2

When last we heard from G.I. Joe 2, or The G.I. Joe Sequel, or G.I. Joe: Cobra Strikes, it wasn't called G.I. Joe: Retaliation. But that's what Hollywood Reporter is calling it now, so I guess we're all supposed to follow suit like the mindless automatons that we are. Damn it, we actually liked the title G.I. Joe: Cobra Strikes. Cute play on words there. Maybe they thought it was too cute.

Speaking of "too cute," Hollywood dreamboat Bruce Willis (just go with us on this) is in negotiations to appear in Jon M. Chu's new G.I. Joe movie, which sounds increasingly kind of awesome. An almost entirely new cast (pity about Rachel Nichols, certainly) promises to quell the bad blood from G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra, and now comes the news that Willis will be playing General Joe Colton, the man who started the whole "G.I. Joe" enterprise and, frankly, a bit of a minor character. But paying attention to the actual story of the comic books – which aren't half bad, particularly compared to the original TV series – is a good idea for Mr. Chu, who would do well to include a story that actually makes a lick of sense this time out.

Now… Where's our Serpentor?

CRAVE Online will be back with more G.I. Joe: Retaliation (sigh…) news so we can watch this movie duke it out with Resident Evil: Retribution.